Under Water

me at swim practice

me: wait, what are we doing
me: oh, distance butterfly sets, yay!
me: oh shit there's the wall better do a flip turn
me: oh wait im doing butterfly
me: that was the shittiest butterfly turn ive ever done
me: coach is going to yell at me
me: what
me: i should not have eaten that sandwich before practice
me: oh my god im going to throw up
me: false alarm
coach: *muffled yelling*
me: wait what?!
me: oh he's not talking to me
me: just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming,swimming
me: i love that movie
me: i want to go home
me: my arm hurts
me: oh yay, 100x100s
me: oh my god, i have 99 more of these to do
me: and flip and push off the wall and streamline
me: ready set breathe
me: fuck i just inhaled water
me: ok i should think of a motivational song
me: weeeeeeeeeeeeee are never, ever, ever, getting back together!
me: shit no i hate you taylor swift you bitch get your whiny ass music away from me
me: ok, um
me: dammit i just forgot every song that ive ever heard in my entire life
me: oh, flipturn!
me: ow, fuck, just kneed myself in the face
me: yes alright here's my favorite song
me: what's the next line
me: ow just ran into the lane line
me: um, excuse me bitch, if you wish to pass me, tap my feet and i'll move over. do not grab my ankle and pull me down like a fucking carnivorous siren from those greek myths. bitch
me: oh just got lapped
me: look how many fucks i do not give
me: im hungry
me: what time is it
me: im probably sweating really hard right now
me: ow, just got kicked by someone in the other lane
me: whoops, sorry, didnt mean to touch you there, i swear
me: oh my god are we done
me: praise the lord
me: adios until tomorrow, bitches